It’s too early for us to get up!! Silvia and I – neither of us are morning people and even though we went to bed at 9.30pm last night 6.30am feels too early!. It’s raining…..I can hear the drops falling on the roof- Outside our window is the lake- It looks beautiful through the early morning rain- all in soft focus. I am tired- it has already been a long few days of constant movement and adjustment to this very extreme country. We leave the house laden down with the plethora of technical equipment, and our lunch a couple of protein bars purchased at Costco—now all that’s very far away!!! We drive through what is becoming a more familiar sight of the early morning life waking up here in Bukavu. Everywhere we look there is people living life, pumping up old tires, selling food, shoes, sitting in the rain- trying to keep dry as the world around them melts into piles of sodden earth. It’s actually kind of mesmerizing- that and the fact that I am tired give this all a kind of dream, like quality- I am jolted awake by a huge pothole which practically hits my head to the roof of the car! Awake now I remember that I have to run a training today and it will be my first real time of working with a translator – not into one but two languages- first into French and then into Swahili! I am wondering how this double translation will work- I am reminded of the games of whispers where you start by telling one person a sentence and they pass it on to the next and so on until you reach the end of the line- and the final person reports back a sentence which resembles nothing to what was said originally! Let’s just say that this early morning musing held more truth than I could imagine!!!!
We arrive to a small building and are greeted by 25 adolescents ranging in age from 12-20. This is the beginning of a truly transformative experience….
So fast forward it is now Tuesday April 21st and we are finally getting a chance to update our blog! The last few days have changed our lives that is for sure. Silvia and I have been immersed in the world do this Youth drumming and Drama Group- whose name is Tuanmi Yeso- which translated means “the Hope of Tomorrow”. We started the training on Friday morning and ended on Monday evening- Wow I am exhausted I don’t think that I have spoken as many words as I have in t eh last few days in a very long time- and I know that Silvia has cinematographers arm form all the video she has shot! But I can also say that this experience of working with the youth group has been truly wonderful. The training was entitled “Using the Arts with Traumatized people”- and I have to say after spending time here in the DRC it seems it would be hard to not be traumatized by being here. What we have learnt in the last few days is truly eye opening.
So here we are offering a training to a group of wonderful adolescents all of whom themselves are survivors of terrible trauma – They all came to ASO in different ways, some were prostitutes on the street, some had been raped by the FDLR or other Militia groups and were survivors of this terror, some had been in the army as child soldiers and still others had been simply orphaned because of the war. Over the last three days Silvia and I have been touched and appalled by the stories, and also had our hearts uplifted as we witnessed the sheer heart, and resiliency of these kids.
It’s an empowering thing to be able to teach traumatized kids about trauma from the perspective of how they can help others. This framework gave me a really good way to work with them- it gave a certain distance to their own horrible stores- and of course we always had the incredible resources of their magical drums, dancing and playful spirits.
In my work I often use the ideas of how playful someone can be as an indication as to how healthy and well they are- spontaneity; laughter, creativity, and adaptability are all signs of well being. It is certain that these kids are resilient- for they find their power in the drumming, the dancing, and the play. Silvia and I were bowled over by their energy and also their commitment to use their work to help others.
Day one of the training focused on them understanding the difference between someone who is traumatized and someone who is frightened- we used drama and role playing for them to get a sense of how it feels in your body- to be scared – and that trauma is like being scared all the time. I am having to really work my own mind really hard since I am having to put what are complex ideas into a very simple form so that they can both be understood by our wonderful translator Salomon and then he can translate the ideas into French and Swahili- At times it is like a comedy act as I try to get my ideas across to him – for example I discover that there is not really a word for healing…. in Swahili- and that the opposite to traumatized seems best described by de-traumatization… undoing of trauma- not exactly the healing. So I am stretched to think of ways to describe these ideas in a culturally and language specific way. At times I say three words in my attempt to keep things simple and Salomon ends up saying about 15 sentences – explaining the idea.
We are reminded that most if not all of these kids have not been to school- and have not developed thinking skills. Also lets remember they are also traumatized- some more obviously and severely than others- Every time we break out in playing games the energy in the room is so vibrant that we are transfixed- and the drumming is so amazing. Really it’s hard to believe that Lena has only been teaching some of them for under a year. And another thing here we are in a country where violence against women has reached an epidemic proportion and we are with a mixed group of youth- who are lining into a whole new paradigm where girls and boys play drums together and where girls and boys have equal say…its is a new model- one that we could do well adopt ion all countries!
Having covered understanding trauma and having them share some of their stories- we move along to the next module which is all about safety- again we are challenged to translate this well- but we work on it……I can feel my brain slowly turning to mush as I am challenged to find new way to communicate and also to constantly having to update and revise the plan since this is certainly a very different culture. Finally it seems that we have a sense of what safety is- We ask them to draw pictures of safety. This is the first time that I have seen them concentrate in quietness- there is stillness in the room that is meditative and calm- they take their time with the colors….
Soon we are all in the circle and we offer a space for them to share what safety is for them. So this is how it unfolds- we start to hear all the ways in which they have felt unsafe that are in their pictures- and only then can they talk about safety. What became striking about each story was that the same things that scared them in another context made them safe. So they were scared of the army, the militia, the police, but also expressed that they felt protected by the army, the militia, the police at times. This was very confusing- but once again – it is a sign of a very confusing and mind bending situation where you are not sure who is part of what – or whose side they are on- or indeed who they are going to attack. In summary the closest thing that I could get to safety with them was: being with other people, being protected by the police and being protected by God. It was very hard to get them to have sense that maybe safety could be inside of themselves- But we persevere with the idea that safety has a felt sense to it- and this began to work- slowly slowly- Pole pole as they say in Swahili!!!
In the evening after this training day we met with Maria Baird who is the Program Co-ordinator for the Psycho Social program at Panzi. We spoke of many things – but what she told us was that she had just returned from Bunykiri a province in South Kivu (here) apparently the FDLR are about to launch a new set of attacks there- and they are expecting the situation to get very bad. The femicide continues- She said that they expect the amount of women that will be coming to Panzi will increase and the terrifying violence will prevail. I am wondering about any kind of safety here- how do we find safety in such an intense place as this? Silvia and I both know that we have nothing in our experience to compare to living in this kind of chaotic instability- and yet we are also learning that the way forward has to be through finding the safety, the connection, the resiliency to rebuild this nation. When you look around Bukavu at the natural environment you can hardly believe that a place that looks like paradise can be so violated- it’s not just the women who get raped here it is the earth as well.
The training with ASO continues and we see that slowly they start to stretch their creative ability. Which is a challenge- they are bright and want to learn – but are very literal- when we ask them to start to work with metaphor or the symbolic world they struggle- and so do i!!! It is not clear to me or Silvia if what we are seeing is a lack of creativity because of trauma, because of years of being colonized and violated country where it was not safe to have your own ideas…or if is in the culture itself. This opens up many discussions from me with others about how trauma presents it self- when it becomes embedded in the culture and how looks as a norm- How many generations have to live through brutality of all kinds before the trauma just becomes so embedded? Never mind the theory- we are here with this living breathing and very loving kind hearted kids. So much so that we are amazed at their capacity to move beyond discrimination with each other. In the group we have kids who have been literally thrown away because of disability- one of the young guys has no hands or really feet- yet he is drumming as good as the next one dancing up a storm and he has the best handwriting!@!!! Talk about resilience in the face of adversity! Both Silvia and I are in awe of him. Another girl we learn got run out of her village when both her parents died as they accused her of being a Witch. We learn of the severity of this- and the intensity of the world of sorcery and black magic here. And in amongst it all we still continue to play and find out what is safe and talk about best they can work with the traumatized people (read here themselves!!)
Over the three days we have been stressing to them that they are both social/community artists who perform and who are also using their art to help others so they start to see themselves as possible facilitators and social artists who are making a difference e in their war torn world. From the questions that they are asking and what they are doing we start to see that they understand that they are able to work with the people who need them the most. In the final part of the training we really start to work on them understanding what it means to be a good facilitator- of drama games, or drumming. How to be sensitive to the groups they are working with the different needs they have! WOW I know sounds more like a graduate level course in group facilitation I know…but without hesitation we prevail with this ambitious plan.!!!
Trusting that they will take what works and leave the rest….that they might at least start to incorporate in their work with the trauma survivors some of the trauma work we have learnt.
Ok ----phew this is a long posting. We are exhausted it has been a very full few days- and of course we have not even written half of what has happened……We are full of Bukavu- it assaults our sense on every level and also makes our hearts sing out……stay tuned. We leave fo r Kigali in the morning and will have time to publish more.
Sending out gratitude for our own lives as we live them……
Elayne …and Silvia
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